Seeker

I’ve been a little busy and stressed lately as you can imagine. I’ve been hustling for extra money since everything is costing me an arm and a leg it seems. So Angela and Ryan are getting along fine, but her medical bills have been astronomical, and I have been paying for all of them. I write Angela a check and she pays them out. It’s been close to $2000 so far. She had no insurance, it turns out. Ryan, likewise has had his share of problems. I love feeding him and watching his snail-like lips suck on the see-through pacifier. I love poking him softly in his little buddha-belly and watching him look at me in amazement, stopping his feeding on the spot, only to resume them a moment later when nothing else happens. He has required a special, super-expensive formula for his reflux problems. That only adds insult to injury.

So tomorrow I am heading to  see Cherise. I missed going there last week because Angela had a bleeding episode and had to go the the hospital. While she was there, I had a quick meal with Shana at a nearby restaurant – a quaint little French spot. Angela had been given some strong pain medications and was knocked out. Her tests were going to take several hours, so I decided to take a chance and ask Shana out since she lived relatively nearby. I told Shana that I had been called into work and had only a short time to spend. It was hard to keep my hands off her when I saw her, I wanted to take her out back and rip her clothes off… I was so horny. It seems like I had a ton of women but get less and less sex! Because I wasn’t spending the night with her, Shana told me that she wasn’t going to have sex with me tonight – I really just wanted a blow job or a quickie in the car! It was so painful to walk away from all that beauty!

So, I snuck away from Angela to see Shana, who snubbed me in my moment of need! I blew $100 on the meal also! I got back in time for Angela to be discharged though. Not a moment too soon!

I had to work the next day after losing sleep feeding Ryan, who changed from a quiet, cute baby, to some sort of crying, pooping machine, getting up every 2 hours for one reason or another! I had red, bleary eyes when I arrived at work, my whole body was buzzing with exhaustion. Ashley was working a shift today, so I was able to sneak briefly up to a call room with her and blow off some frustration. She made me pull out when I came, which ended up soaking my scrub top and hers with my ‘pride and joy.’ I merely wiped it up afterwards while we both laughed it off. It wasn’t so funny when I did a Wood’s lamp examination and my cum visibly showed up on my scrub top a few patients later! (The fluorescent light  from the Wood’s lamp highlights semen stains – we use the lamp to look at eye injuries.) Luckily the patient had their glasses off, but my shirt was rubbing against her face as I leaned over her. Poor girl…if she only knew! She was actually quite cute…

I had a short temper today as the shift went on, but one patinent in particular really got to me. The patient had become a regular visitor, but she never gave a real name or identification. For the Emergency Department, no identification is ever needed, and she never gave one. She was pregnant, and had been seen before for pregnancy related issues. She knew we had no Obstetrical services and as soon as she saw me, she demanded that I transfer her immediately without an examination. She was rude and obnoxious and unthankful. Thank God for free care – if that was even care. Patients can demand an immediate transfer and get it too. It turns out she walked off the ambulance when it got tho the next hospital. She just wanted a ride to get to her friend’s house which was near the other facility. That was a $1000 cost to the system and taxpayer!

-T.C.

So it’s another 3 A.M morning rush in the Emergency Department. The parents of a 7 month old bring their child in for a fever that it’s had for four days. They have seen us twice and their primary doctor earlier today, and no one can tell them why the child has a fever.Of course the parents didn’t give any fever medicine in the past 6 hours, so of course the child woke up and vomited. Of course none of the physicians before me started any antibiotics. That’s really what the parents wanted. Yes, I know I should have some antibiotic stewardship and not randomly start antibiotics without a treatable source. The child didn’t have an ear infection or a cough or infected urine test, but the child looks great after some motrin given by us. I just want the parents to go away. The child has a virus and will get better eventually with or without our help. At least they vaccinated the child, so it makes meningitis and more obscure diseases less likely. My solution, as the fifth opinion on this child in three days, is to call the diagnosis an ear infection even if I don’t see one and give a shot of antibiotics. It’s like therapeutic acupuncture, and for some reason, it makes the parents think I care and have validated their worries over their child. I also prescribed antibiotics as well for home to give the parents something to do. In fact, I always diagnose ear infections in children even if they don’t have one because inevitably the child will return again to me or someone else within a day or two with a continued fever and the parents will be angry that no ‘medicine’ was started. Who cares about antibiotic resistance anyway? With the AIDS epidemic, antibiotics have been prophylactically used for years! Likewise, it seems that most of our patients have MRSA warnings of resistant-bacteria colonization on them. Patient that have had a prior wound, blood, or urine cultures from prior visits to the hospital with positive results for resistant bacteria will end up with a label of MRSA or some other resistant bacteria on their chart so as to warn everyone to take ‘precautions.’ Of course, many of these patients have multiple visits to the hospital and yet have no ‘real’ medical diagnosis, but during all these visits, they acquire resistant bacteria. They may have a cough, or sore throat, or ankle sprain, or whatever , but every ailment and boo-boo must be prayed, cultured, or cat scanned. If an ailment is minimized by the doctor and a cat scan or blood test isn’t done, then clearly the medical provider is ‘non-caring’ in the eyes of the patient. Satisfaction surveys will be poor for the poor bastard, who then looses his job. Therefore I do blood work, cat scans, initiate antibiotics, and prescribe pain medications with impunity so I can spare my job and not make my ‘clients’ (patients) angry. No complaints at the end of the day is what I want. I don’t want to be sitting in front of an administrator who slaps my wrist because ‘I made a patient mad.’

My next patient came in because she had muscle aches for three weeks and had started a cholesterol medicine a month ago. Of course it is 4 A.M. and she was from another state, visiting friends, so she says. I was forced to do blood work on her to validate her ‘muscle aches.’ In reality, I could have just told her to stop the medicine and go home, but she wanted Percocet, because her pain was a ’30 out of 10′. I hate the fucking pain scale. Everyone always states their pain is more than a 10/10, so I decided to use a clock for a pain scale. If you have more than a 12 pain, then the scale rolls over to a one! IN this particular case, the lady wanted a script for pain pills. She, of course, was allergic to aspirin, motrin, ultram, and anything without Percocet in it.

The night slowly degenerated with burnt out alcoholics coming in by ambulance to be seen for falls, ‘suicidal threats’, or intoxication in public. It just can’t get any better. I don’t fix anyone, I just do damage control, and I get it. I get a pay check. My one lucky break was an intoxicated bastard who left his Perocet out on the gurney. I snagged it to sell to one of my ‘patients.’

I got to see Ashley again in the radiology department so I could decompress myself. We emerged sweaty and panting from the empty changing room after a twenty minute session. It was so awesome to have a ‘quickie’. Ashley wanted one too. Clara mentioned that Ashley was frustrated with Zack, with whom she was spending most nights with. Apparently he was not in relationship mode, but rather was using Ashley for sex….how cruel. She did have an awesome, smooth body. I loved seeing her in knee-chest mode!!!

Nothing beats the smooth warm nakedness of a glowing radiology girl in a changing room!

-T.C.

This weekend, I am going to head down to see Cherise. She has been a bit agitated lately because I have been ignoring her. I called her and chatted for an hour on the phone with her, which I thought would appease her, but apparently not. I am exhausted, and was able to get only three hours of sleep because Melanie wanted to meet up for lunch. I popped a Ritalin to get me moving, but I met with ‘Mr. Contact’ on my way over to give him a bottle of Dilaudid 4 mg tablets that I had snatched from a DOA (dead on arrival) patient who had multiple medication vials in a bag under the bed. It’s been an easy task to collect mediations from the older folk in the department. No one seems to care or monitor it, except Phillip, who seems to be following me incessantly as I work.

I collected $500 for the bottle and was on my way. I could at least pay the mortgage, give Angela some money for Ryan and her rent, and send some extra money down to Cherise. Meanwhile, I needed to purchase some Truvada because I didn’t want to contract HIV from Melanie. Truvada decreases transmission rates of HIV, and since I wasn’t using a condom with her, I wanted to at least do something. It was hard for me to resist Melanie’s powerful persuasive powers….it’s like a tractor beam for my cock…beam see up Scottie!

Melanie had been drinking early this morning, so she was a bit wild when I showed up. I was starting to get the buzz from the Ritalin, which by the way, I snagged as well from a younger mental patient one of my colleagues evaluated in the Emergency Department. I was always amazed by the assortment of pills some of the ‘mental’ are on: Haldol for the psychosis, amphetamines to wake them up from the MSContin they use for chronic pain, which makes them anxious so they need clonazepam (a valium-like medicine), which in turn make them sleepy and so they need the amphetamine to stay awake. Mix that with the marijuana and sometimes alcohol and cocaine, it almost becomes a drug buffet!

When I got to Melanie’s place, I imbibed in Mimosa’s that she was having. I love those things! I had a buzz in no time. Next thing I found was Melanie was wrapping her thighs around my waist and going places that no man had gone before….She was going geographic on me!

Where’s the mimosas?

I’ll fight you for the rum!

I can’t wait to dive into that body! Let’s go savage!

-T.C.

I have to work again today after three hours of sleep. Ryan kept crying for some reason. I guess the beast is starting to come out of those tiny lips! Angela crashed hard, so I actually got up and fed Ryan. I feel like I’m going to break him everytime I hold him, but then I remember how I have to deal with children at work, especially when I stitch them up. I love watching those see-through pacifiers as his lips suck on it. It almost looks like a snail on a glass aquarium! I’m beginning to like the little guy.

After a late afternoon lunch with Angela, I ran to my parent’s house. My mom was feeling a bit ill, so I went to check on her. I wrote her a script for an antibiotic for her bronchitis. She was rattling with every cough. Meanwhile, I fielded a few texts from Melanie and Shana. They both wanted a visit, but I decided on Shana, because I was feeling frisky and Shana could get real crazy under the covers!

Shana is waiting!

I felt bad leaving my mom so quickly, but time was short today, and Shana was waiting, and I only had a few hours to spend before my shift. Before  I could go for my visit, I had to stop at home to get my clothes and basic ‘stuff’ for work. I kept my car loaded with changes of clothing, toiletries, and other apparel because I was always on the run. I practically lived in the car. My house had cobwebs growing on the front door for lack of use! I actually hate being at home because it reminds me of Sarah all the time.

I read my mail on the way to see Shana – bill after bill it seems was in my overflowing mailbox. Late fees, threatening letters, and collection agencies were all piling on me. I had some cash after my exchanges at the Emergency Department, but that wasn’t enough. I am stressed, and I took it all out on Shana in bed today!

Sat down for a quickie and a quick meal with Shana

As for work tonight, it was business as usual. I had a few more clients come in for pain medicine refills. I needed that cash really bad. My contact was excellent about sending me business. I made an extra thousand as a result of that. I also managed to grab another bottle of Percocet from an oncology patient in the department. I was able to reach in and grab the bottle after he went for a cat scan and his belongings were left behind. In fact, I even pilfered his gold chain. I had no qualms about it – I was desperate for money. As for Phillip, who was here again tonight,  I made certain the nurses kept him busy. He somehow keeps lurking in the shadows. At some point I need to solve this problem, and I know he’s watching me.

As for my patient load tonight – it was all about bad teeth- Literally. All the methamphetamine out there had destroyed half of the city’s teeth. I can’t imagine having ground-down, black, pointy nubs for teeth! I would never smile again, but these patient come in all the time and have horrible teeth with stank for breath…I don’t know how their partners can stand it, unless they too are on drugs! One patient was being seen for a tooth ache at 3 A.M., her eyes were half-closed because her Methadone kept her in a perpetual zombie-like state. I swear that the zombie apocalypse is here – all these drugged-out people live their lives day-to-day, remembering nothing except when the next time for their pain medication will be! Bad teeth – what an easy way to score pain medication!

One last thing for my shift….I can’t stand the way Phillip is following me around. As I went to the doctor’s room, he was standing at the hallway’s edge, staring me down as if to say, “I know what you did.” Maybe I’m just being self-conscious.

-T.C.

I was a bit nervous on my next shift. Phillip was working again and it seemed that everywhere I went, Phillip was there, watching me. We actually never acknowledged each others presence at any time. In fact, he and I used to talk every time we saw each other at work, but now the cats out of the bag and we say nothing to each other. What was Phillip going to do next about what he saw? Probably nothing. He didn’t see me hand off the pill bottle after work to Mr. Contact (as I call him) . I was supposed to write another prescription for oxycontin 30’s for a guy named Will Slazel today. He was a regular visitor at the department, usually for back pain, but today, he was my ‘customer’ – a mere $500 was paid out in the room for the bottle of 100 pills. Very cheap relative to the street price. My heart pounded as we proceeded with the transaction. I kept looking at the door to see if it would slam open….in fact moments after I gave the prescription to Will, Phillip walked in, pretending to be re-stocking the room. That was close. I quickly left after that, annoyed at my new shadow.

I called Angela to see how Ryan was doing later in the shift. Ryan had been sleeping wonderfully and so far he has been an easy baby. I count my few blessings. The night went up and down otherwise. I had one mother sign her 6 year old son in at 2 A.M because he said he had ‘heart’ pain. Really? Like there are thousands of 6 year olds having heart attacks, and by the way, why is he up at 2 A.M? It was just a bit of gas that he had, but I had to do the old ‘EKG and chest Xray routine’ to appease the mother so she wouldn’t complain that I demeaned his complaint. The mother weighed about 300 pounds herself and looked like she was having the heart attack! The whole time I was interviewing them, I could have sworn she was videoing me on her phone, because she held it up at me as I spoke and examined her ‘critically ill’ son. Earlier I had another child that had been pushed on the playground into her sibling. The child that had been pushed had a split lip that needed nothing to be done other than some cleaning. The mother mentioned the other child had hit her head, but there was no obvious injury and she wasn’t the patient. I even examined the other child without her being an official patient and said everything was fine, but that wasn’t enough. After I finished with the first cild, the mother promptly checked in the second child to get me to officially ‘see’ the child. Of course nothing was wrong and I sent them both home with a ‘pat on the back’. Nowadays everyone is worried about having a ‘concussion.’ It’s trendy I guess. No matter how small the injury, it’s a concussion. I sneezed – I have a concussion!

I was glad to finish my shift. I drove over to Angela’s to see her and Ryan. Angela has started to slim down a bit after delivering the other week. She is looking sexy again. We decided to be bad this morning and ‘do it’ a bit earlier than we were supposed to since we were supposed to wait 6 weeks after the delivery. As a result, Angela bled a bit, but it had been a long time it seemed, and it was definitely fun!

The way I feel about my patient’s at work sometimes!

Can’t wait until Angela gets her old body back!

-T.C.

It was so sad to see Farah leave. She was en route to Miami to meet up with relatives coming from Europe, but she decided to stop in to see me. When we awakened the next afternoon, having slept for 14 hours, we both realized how fleeting our interlude had been. Farah’s eye teared up as we had sex one last time. I was surprised she had become so attached to me, but I am certain it was just her age that was making her so clingy. I hope she doesn’t go psycho on me!

Next thing I knew, I was on my way to Angela’s. She had taken a cab home with Ryan earlier today because she didn’t want to wait for me. She was a bit irritated with me when I came in and quickly voiced her opinion that I should have taken some time off for her. I actually was off, but I couldn’t say a word. I had to recant the hospital name I started talking to her about when I explained how busy I had been, especially since I hadn’t called her in the past day! She quickly caught on and asked me about the exact place I had worked at yesterday. Of course, I quickly recognized I had misspoke and apologized to her about telling her I had made a mistake about which hospital I had just been at. “Liars never remember their stories,” was what Angela responded to me after I finished my explanation. I looked at her in a puzzled manner to which she then told me she had tried to call me at the place I said I was working at. In fact she had tried several of my hospitals I work at. No one had seen me. I stared at her dumbfounded that she would try to hunt me down, and now I was caught in a lie. To that, I stood my ground. ” I was at Memorial Regional Hospital, just like I said. The person who answered the phone clearly didn’t know what they were talking about.” I don’t think that answer satisfied Angela, but what else was she going to do?

Ryan was so cute, all snuggled in his blue cap and crib. His nose flared steadily with each breath and his eyes twitched as he slept comfortably. Angela looked exhausted, laying on the couch, eyes half open. I sat next to her and tried to rub her back, but she arched away from me. I decided to take control of the situation and just walk out. I quickly looked back as I shut the door and could see a surprised look on Angela’s tearful face….

An hour later, I sat at my home, all alone listening to the creaking of my ceiling as the wind howled by. All alone. I could feel Sarah’s presence in the house to this day. So many months and not a word from her. I miss her. My heart began to race as I realized how my life had been changing, and now I have a child. I want to do the right thing and take care of Ryan and Angela, but what if I made the wrong choice? I didn’t want Sarah to leave me forever. I began to sweat as my heart raced faster and faster. I began to panic, pacing the house without relief. I couldn’t stand it. What next? I was about to call my friend, Tom, but I knew he would just tell me what I didn’t want to hear about my life….that it’s fucked up. Instead, I ran to my Valium. I didn’t have to work until late tonight. Down the hatch it went. Peace here I come.

-T.C.

I woke up next to Farah, pretending that I had no other cares in the world. I tried to pretend that there was no one else I was involved with, no stress, no worries. It felt really good. It was just the alcohol in my system that was blunting my mind of all my other worries. Angela is in the hospital with Ryan, Shana has been texting me wildly, Cherise texted me to call,  and Ashley even wanted me to swing by. To add to that, Melanie seems to be a bit clingy for attention and finally Sandra, with whom I had some ‘interaction’ was calling on me. Some sixty text messages, voicemails, and various erotic selfies all blew up my phones. Of course I had two separate phones to keep calls and texts separate, being careful to keep my stories straight, but it is getting more and more complex! I keep forgetting what I told to whom, and I have already gotten busted a few times to various degrees. I am short of money again, so I texted my ‘contact’ about whether he needed any more prescriptions. Of course that went well. I would be writing for some Roxicodone 30’s for $2000 to a man named Rick. I was stressed about the whole affair and popped an Ativan I had stolen from one of my elderly patient’s bottles in the Emergency Department. I have to be careful with the stuff because my parents seemed to notice I was a bit loopy the other day at the family dinner gathering. How they all miss Sarah they all say, but I did bring Melanie over to the house since they all knew her well as Sarah’s sister. Little did they know of Melanie and myself. Melanie never speaks of Sarah. What a tangled mess.

I laid next to Farah, who was sound asleep. We had an extraordinary ‘session’ again after we got in. Today will be another full day of fun and excitement with her, but I have to break away briefly to defuse everyone else in my life,especially Shana and Melanie, who seem to be a bit, as I said earlier, clingy. I did so shortly after getting up, my body buzzing with exhaustion and three hours of sleep, along with debasing substances inside me (Vodka, Ativan, and Weed – which Farah loves).

It took me an hour to call and talk to everyone in the morning, all of whom had endless things to say. I promised everyone something and yet nothing, saying ‘yes’ to getting together shortly. They all heard what they ‘wanted’ to hear. I don’t have enough time! Once all was done, I glided back to Farah. We had a great day together, cruising around town and visiting some great eateries. For tonight, we hit an awesome concert, that we mixed with a little ‘E’ and THC to enhance the sound. Life couldn’t be better!

My way to Farah’s heart

Farah’s summer body

Great food today!

A wild night at the concert – with the help of E and THC!

-T.C.